Let's see if we get any takers for this little corner then. I bet it's all women. Not met a bloke yet who even knew when he'd done something wrong!
So to kick off:
I have knackered the telly (total killing offence in our house). And he has man-flu. And if anyone knows my situation, I am a masochist and have the worst, most miserable misogynist piece of jetsam that ever came to dinner....and stayed 13 years (yes, the irony is not lost on me).
Back to the abreaction. - I did it. I chuffed about with the settings/menu/choices and anything else that looked remotely variable. The damn thing is all over the place - and I can't get it back to normal now.
He has been kicking off for 2 days solid. Two major rows, multiple skirmishes and I am kipping on the sofa. The cat is under the stairs.
And I have lied my face off. Told him SKY did it. That they can send signals to the telly that sends it daft. I was very convincing - Oscar performance.
He can't use the phone or the menu so there's no way to blow my cover story. And the telly is still green, which is OK if you want to watch gardening programs all day.
Wait 'til he finds the ginger hair in his shaver. I forgot about that, what with all the hoo ha.